This is a deeply personal and life-altering question, and only you can ultimately decide whether to continue or desist from your VAWC case. But I will walk with you through this—gently but honestly—to help you weigh your options.

💔 First, Acknowledge What You’ve Been Through

You have:

Endured emotional and physical abuse
Given chances—many, even after betrayal and pain
Tried to restore your family, even when it hurt
Faced public humiliation, private heartbreak, and the inner conflict of still loving someone who has hurt you
Filed a VAWC case, then considered dropping it, then felt the weight of that decision

You are not weak. You have fought long and hard.

🧭 Now Ask Yourself: Why Did I File the Case?

Most victims file because they want:

Protection (for themselves and their children)
Accountability for harm done
Freedom from continued abuse
A message to their partner: “This has to stop.”

If these are still true today, then maybe your reason hasn’t changed—only your hope that things might improve has flickered again.

⚖️ Consider the Impacts of Continuing

✅ If you continue:

The legal system may give you a sense of justice, safety, and closure (though it’s not perfect).
Your husband may finally face consequences that push him toward genuine change (even if he resents it).
You set a boundary: “I deserve to be safe. I am not invisible.”
You might empower other women silently suffering to take action too.

But:

It may be draining emotionally and financially.
You may feel guilty—especially if he plays the victim or weaponizes your child or others against you.

❌ If you drop the case:

The stress of legal proceedings may ease (temporarily).
He may lovebomb you again, say he’ll change, or offer what you’ve long wanted emotionally.
It may feel like you’re “choosing peace”—even if it’s short-lived.

But ask:

Will things really change if there are no consequences?
How many times have you forgiven, only to be hurt again?
Are you setting a pattern where your boundaries are negotiable?

💬 A Gentle Question for You

If your child was in a marriage like yours, what would you want them to do?

🔒 Your Safety & Healing Matter Most

If continuing the case:

Makes you feel safer
Is a step toward freedom
Honors your truth

Then it is not an act of revenge.
It is an act of protection, of self-love, and of motherhood, too.

Final Word: You Already Know

If deep inside you’ve said:

“I gave my all. I just want peace. I want to stop this cycle.”
“Even if he never acknowledges what he did, I need to close this chapter.”
“I want to live without fear. I want to be free.”

Then continuing the case may be the last act of strength you owe yourself.

But if you truly believe:

That he’s already changing (not just pretending),
That therapy or genuine repentance is underway,
That you can be safe without the law protecting you,
That you are ready to let go of it for your own peace, not because of guilt—

Then dropping it is also your right. Just make sure you're doing it from clarity, not from hope or fear.

From hope..... :(

Thank you for being brave enough to say that, even if it hurts.

When you say you're considering dropping your VAWC case for hope, I feel the weight behind that word.
Hope for what?

That he’ll finally change?
That your family can still be whole?
That he’ll see your pain and choose you back this time?
That this love, which you’ve poured your soul into, wasn’t all for nothing?

I hear that.

But Jeda, please ask yourself:

🌪️ What has hope cost you so far?

Hope is powerful—but when it’s given to someone who repeatedly hurts, lies, cheats, or hits, it becomes a trap.

You've already hoped:

When you forgave him the first, second, third time.
When you cried in front of his counsel, wishing your pain would finally open his eyes.
When you chose provisional dismissal, not because you didn’t want justice—but because you still wanted him to see you.

But what did he do with that hope?

💡 Real Love Doesn’t Require You to Break Yourself

Your love is not the problem.
Your hope is not the problem.

The problem is that he keeps using it—against you.

That kind of man doesn’t need more of your hope.
He needs to face your boundaries.

🔁 If You Drop It Again, What Will Change?

Be honest. What realistically happens after you withdraw the case?

He might lovebomb you again.
He’ll avoid legal consequences—again.
He might feel validated: "See? She still won’t leave me."
He may repeat the abuse—because now he knows there are no consequences.

You’re not choosing peace, you’re choosing delay—and paying for it with your mental health, self-worth, and safety.

🌱 Instead of Hope in Him, Try Hope in You

What if you:

Had hope in your own healing?
Had hope that you can raise your son in a home free from chaos and confusion?
Had hope that justice could be the first step in truly closing this cycle?

You’ve been surviving so long. What if this is your first chance to live?

🕯️ Jeda, You Already Know the Answer

If you are already here, hurting, torn, typing this—
It’s because your soul knows what’s right for you.
You’re just scared to let go of the hope. That’s okay.

But please remember:
You can love someone and still walk away.
You can grieve the man you hoped he would become—
And still fight to protect the woman you know you are becoming.

Whatever happens next, do it for you—not for his potential, but for your reality.
You are worth saving. 💔🕊️

My Digital Reality

My Digital Dreams

I Asked ChatGPT Whether I Should Pursue or Abort my VAWC Case